C. O. V. I. D. 1.9. - Couples Overcoming Valid Issues Daily
We know! Everyone is tired of hearing Covid, covid, covid. But because it’s such a big deal right now, we just had to get in on it. You know how when something is a new fad and everybody is doing it or wearing it, so you just have to have it too. Well, we thought we could make some people laugh while at the same time help some folks.
Some people are loving being home together and having fun doing things together and trying new things. They have found new things in common and new ways to get things done. They have also created some new traditions. For example some couples are working from home and have created work space in the same room and it works. Other couples work in different rooms and that’s okay too. At the same time they have develop new habits and routines such as working out together or going walking; having movie night; or cooking together.
While there are some couples who are struggling to remain in the same house at the same time on a consistent basis. What we have found is that some couples weren’t getting along before this happened and being confined in the house together has really drawn the division line and they feel that their relationship will never work. Other couples were getting along but now that they are forced to spend so much time together in a confined space, they realize that they just didn’t know each other and they don’t like what they see. While other couples have learned more about one another and realize there are some things that they don’t like or didn’t know about, but they feel they can work through them but don’t know the best way to do. Which one are you?
We know that there are things that couples can do to work out every issue. The questions is…., Are you willing to put in the work? Do you love your spouse enough to give them the benefit of the doubt and ‘try’? Can you stand the test? What are you willing to do? If you love your spouse and you want to stay married and have an amazingly happy, successful marriage, there are tried and true things that you can do. Below are a few tips to help you get started during C.O.V.I.D. Join our free webinar this Friday at 7pm EST by clicking here C.O.V.I.D. COUPLES
C – Couples Compromise (married, engaged, living together, seriously dating) – Learn to compromise and how to correct your own self, meaning pay attention to what you say, how you say it, your tone, your body language, the time, place and what you and the other person are doing. Sometimes if you can see yourself from the other persons eyes or see yourself if someone were talking to you, you can istantly correct yourself or switch it up. Just imagine how you would feel in that same place. So examine yourself. What can you do differently? Can you say it or do it differently? Is your way the only way?
O – Overcome Easily – Sometimes we just have to get over it. It’s not that serious. Ok. So your feelings are hurt. You don’t like what they said or did. Ask for an apology or give them an apology. We should learn to make it a habit to apologize. Apologizing does not mean that you did something wrong (or right), it simply means that I did not mean what I said or did to come across like that or affect you that way. It means, we can get past this. I don’t want this to come between us so I’m willing to work it out.
V – Validate Each Other – Validate your spouse if they do something around the house or specifically for you! Let them know that they did a good job or that you appreciate what they did. Thank them. Tell them how great they are. Let them know that they did something that you like or appreciate. Tell them you love them….. just because. Men especially like to know that you see them as your hero, someone you can lean on or depend on. Women like to know that the things they naturally do aren’t being taken for granted. So say something positive to them to let them know you noticed.
I – Issues Solved – [no privacy, too close for comfort, feeling suffocated, not talking, not talking nicely, attitudes, on the phone too much, over buying online, no love, no lovin’, feeling alone, not helping around the house or with kids]. Now it’s time to have a conversation specifically around what needs to happen in your home. Forget the outside world right now. It’s all about your relationship, your family, your home, your life. If something is bothering you, address it. If you don’t like the way things are done, figure out the best way to change it. To do that, you are going to have to have a real conversation to discuss them and figure it out together.
D – Daily Relate – What will you do daily to make sure you are moving forward in your relationship? Is there anything that you need to change, add, take away, consider, propose? What does your day look like? What would you like it to look like? Do you like it to just be fluent and everyone do their own thing? Would you like it to be more organized? Would you like there to be mostly free time and some scheduled time? Types of things that could be organized or scheduled are = breakfast, lunch or dinner or all 3; movie night for the family; family game night; a family project, time outside, prayer. Things that could be unscheduled is up until 3’oclock everyone is on their own. After that certain duties need to be done. Or after dinner, you take turns deciding what you will do together.
The key is to get on one page. The way to unlock that key is to have a valid conversation. That conversation needs to real and transparent. You want to know how to do that, register for our MasterCourse this Sunday 4/12@ 7pm EST, COUPLES CONNECTING CONSISTENLY: 7 Principles of Communication for Successful Relationships, scheduled for this Sunday afternoon at 7pm. That’s before dinner and movie/TV time. Just click here, COUPLES CONNECTING.
LET'S IT ON AND STAY CONNECTED WHILE WE GROW HEALTHY, HAPPY WHOLE AND SUCCESSFUL RELATIONSHIPS!!
James and Cynthia Greene, Your Marriage Strategists